Showing posts with label depression. Show all posts
Showing posts with label depression. Show all posts

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Domestic Violence Info

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE STATISTICS
·        85% - 95% of all domestic violence victims are female 
·        Over 5000,00 women are stalked by an intimate partner each year 
·        5.3 million women are abused each year 
·        As many as 324,000 women each year experience domestic violence during their pregnancy 
·        1,232 women each year are killed by an intimate partner 
·        Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women 
·        Women are more likely to be attacked by someone that they know rather than by a stranger 
·        An estimated 5.3 million cases of domestic violence occur among U.S. women 18 and older each year, resulting in nearly 2 million injuries 
·        On average, more than three women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends in the U.S. every day 
·        In a survey by the US Conference of Mayors, 56% of cities surveyed cited domestic violence as a primary cause of homelessness 
·        50% to 70% of men who abuse women also abuse children 
·        Homicide is the leading cause of death for women in the workplace 
·        Of the approximately 1.7 million incidents of workplace violence that occur in the U.S. every year, 18,700 are committed by an intimate partner: a current or former spouse, lover, partner or boyfriend/girlfriend

     Are you yet wondering why I posted this, even before I begin my story? Well you see, that you seeing those statistics is more important to me than you even reading my story. Yes today I am going to tell you 2 stories, summed up. Prepare yourself, they are not pretty.

     This weekend a friend of mine came to my house. She had sun glasses on and so I asked why, even though I already knew the answer. You see her face was badly beaten on both sides. She had a horrible black eye and could barely walk upright because of the bruises on her ribs. I had to take her under my wing for the last few days because she didn’t know what to do.

     I proceeded in helping her to find the resources necessary. From the start she needed to visit the hospital and even be strong and tell them what happened. The hospital got the police involved, which made it easier for her to do the right thing and turn him in. I am glad she followed through because you will not believe what happened next. Her boyfriend left her house after beating the crap out of her and went straight to the police and turned her in! I guess he didn’t realize how badly he tore up her face and thought that he could get away with it. Now I don’t know where this is going yet, I just wanted to put the knowledge into everyone’s head.
Now I will share my summed up version of a very lengthy story with you.


     In the beginning of 2005 I met the most wonderful, sweet, romantic man. He was my prince charming and he lifted my spirits and gave me the world. About 3 months into the relationship he hit me for the first time. He didn’t ‘just’ hit me but remember this is the short version. Immediately when he was through he loved me so much, and was so-so very sorry and promised never to do it again. This went on every couple months for the next 3 years until he almost killed me. I made him go to therapy, with no avail. He was just doing it to please me. So one day I packed me and my kids up from my own house (I was the only one on the lease) and went to the domestic violence shelter. I ended up getting fed up with being there and got a macho attitude that I should be in my own home, it was mine and I deserved to be there. True fact: I did deserve to be there, safely though. Needless to say I went home, he said everything I wanted to hear and then he moved back in. 1 month later I lost custody of my children because of the abuse and that only made it worse. I almost died, probably 5 times. And then PRISON saved my life.

     There’s more but that’s enough for today. The moral is, stop it on site. Men (and women) who cause Domestic Violence are unpredictable. They are capable of anything, even framing you for their behavior. They will eventually kill you, so please call the police, shelter, anyone you can and ask for help. Remember never to go back after the first time, it ALWAYS progresses. One last fact; I never turned him in and to this day he continues to find weaker willed women, quiet and depressed or just reserved because he sniffs them out like a hound dog and thinks he can control them, and he beats them too. All because I let him get away with it and so are the others. And I regret it everyday. Women please do the right thing.

     *I am not a therapist or Domestic Violence worker of any kind, this is solely based off life experience.



Wednesday, September 11, 2013

What's Up Wednesday


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Hey ya'll! It's Wednesday and I've been a major slacker, but since it's time for What's Up I suppose I can share why.

First of all, Happy Patriot Day. I hope everyone has a glorious day although I know way too many are not. I'm actually in a so-so mood myself. I always have a rough 9/11, but my thoughts are with everybody out there in America today and I send my prayers and blessings.




This is actually my 1st year out of the hospital on this day for quite a long time. I get very depressed, it has taken me this long to figure out that our bodies and time are in sync, so when a bad time of year starts rolling around our mind picks up on it even if we are unaware of the thoughts causing the sadness. But this year I paid attention because I did become aware of why and when my depression was beginning. And today being Patriot day does not mean I'm free and clear, nor that my emotional stress is over. Today is actually the very beginning. I think I'll make it this time, many thanks to my 5 therapists right now, and I hope all of you find a way for you to make it through too.

On to What's Up in my life. As I mentioned above I have 5 therapists. Yep I am finally facing all those horrible bad things in my life mostly through Cognitive Therapies. Which means I am extremely busy with lots of appointments and deep detailed homework. Taking a look deep inside is very draining. I'm on my 3rd week and I'm more tired than if I was working a full time job, (kind of glad I'm not right now, geez I feel for those who do), also I am adjusting to a lot of new medications and it is totally slowing me down.

So obviously I want to blog. I love to blog. I just haven't made it a priority lately for a few reasons. One I am exhausted right now and two I really am not getting anywhere with my blog. Not where I would like to be and definitely not where I think I should be. This is a real slow process for me. So for now I'm allowing it to be slow so that I do not become overwhelmed. I am thinking of taking it as slow as I feel and blogging here and there but first and foremost to read more blogs about how to actually write good posts. I get a lot of enjoyment out of typing my thoughts and feelings out and hitting those publish and share buttons, but I want you all to get the most enjoyment out of taking the time to read it also.


Yes what I am saying is I need some tips PLEASE, so for those of you reading I am asking for your tips, hints, advice and criticism. Please comment or email me once you've looked over my blog, and always leave your blog url so I can check out your amazing writings. With that I am going to close out with peace and love and many, many blessings. Thanks for stopping by on my What's Up Wednesday (which will someday be a link-up).

P.S. Don't think I'm giving up on blogging because that is not my intention. My intentions are to make it the most important aspect of my life outside of myself, my family and my wonderful friends, especially the ones I've met online. :)


Wednesday, May 1, 2013

What's Up Wendesday

What is today? Is it Wednesday? Yep it sure is. Guess I'm gonna do a
What's Up Wednesday!!!
So lets see, uh okay damn, the last post I did was last Wednesday. And wow it has been a crappy week. Might I first just be honest with myself and everyone else and first say that I am diagnosed with Bi-Polar Disorder. Ha, and my next confession may or may not, probably not, have anything to do with being Bi-Polar. However I spent Friday through Tuesday curled up on the couch, mostly sleeping and eating very little and double duty sulking in my sad little pitiful excuse of a life. Yea I did and honestly I think that's 3 weeks in a row now. But don't be confused because that's not technically a depression phase. At least not a typical one anyway. Depression lasts for 3 weeks or more but it has to be consecutive. And generally for no reason at all.
Depression and Mania

Well I sat sulking in my misery this week because as soon as it happened I recognized the pattern. And by God admitting it is a very hard thing to do so I think I'm gonna keep that to myself for now. Lets just see if we have a week 4 or not. Week 3 should not have happened but when it hit me I lost all control and that made it even worse. Lets see I could be rapid-cycling but I doubt that's the case, even though that's the type I typically am. I cannot sleep for the life of me and I did some major cleaning and organizing all night and all day yesterday, but I had the energy and it was way over due. Now if I am in a Phase again, jeez it's been soooo long, I have obviously been learning to deal with it a little better. Yay.
Completely Normal
And moving on. I just wanted to touch base and say that I did manage to complete 3 out of 5 goals on 5 for Five last week, so for being in a sappy mood that's not too bad. However I am not planning any for this week. Maybe just try not to argue with anyone. That would just ruin my mood. I'm in a good mood because I had some unexpected old friends stop by to visit. They are amazing. I love em. I also talked to a favorite person on the phone and that hasn't happened lately. Hopefully I see him today. If I make it through the day. I'm tired from all the cleaning I did. :( Anyway I should probably get up like a normal person today. Take a shower, dress up, do my hair and make up and stop being a sad lil pup. Don't know if I've been funny at all but at least now I'm trying to make myself smile. Thanks for reading my roller coaster journey, please follow me.


Wednesday, April 24, 2013

What's Up Wednesday

Okay so this is What's Up, I have so much energy today that I actually got bored for a moment because I was so hyper I didn't know what to do with myself. I'm guessing that has something to do with the fact that I got very sad last Wednesday and was in bed being lazy for about 4 days. Now I am refreshed and totally energized. I feel like I could take on the world. I can do anything I want to do. Now, honestly I just gotta keep this going and hurry up and figure out what I really want to conquer. I conquered a lot last week, I was getting shit done.

Then me and Jason had  a talk and of course as soon as you talk about feelings and the future, someone has to get all anxious and try to bail. Depressing crap, especially when the only reason you talk about that crap is because he decides to say that he loves you. Loves me but then wants to run-away. Well I think that we got that all cleared up. We decided that if we do get in that lovey mood and say crazy things that we'll know it's in the heat of the moment (not sex people) and we will just not take it seriously. I never did anyway. My heart is in hate mode, which means I am protecting it for now.

Also, What's Up is that last week I got the mole on my lip cut off. I'm going to blog about it with pictures once it is completely healed. Almost there.

Me and My Wonderful Sisters

And my 'lil sis Nakita sent me an invitation for her Bachelor's Degree Graduation. I am totally pumped about it and can't wait for the date. (I better be able to go.) I only graduated with a certification so technically she'll be the first from our family. Go Nakita, I love you girl!

And then I have totally been blogging a lot, obviously for myself. That's totally fine on some of this stuff but I wish I was interesting enough to get at least one follower. I wonder what I can do better. If you are reading this, I would love to hear some feedback in the comments section. At least I always have it saved for myself, that's all that really matters. I have lost so much digital documents that blogging makes it really nice for journaling because it's always saved online. Also clouds are like my digital best friend. I love the backup and accessing from any device. Really awesome. And now I am rambling, blah, blah, blah. I got to go, later lovies!


Thursday, March 21, 2013

Depression Update

Depression Update



Today I must write a little update about me because I haven't wrote since Monday. And Monday I really wasn't feeling up to it. I just realized what happened to me today when I was finally trying to get back in the game of life, if you will. Something happened Sunday or Monday, I don't know what all I know is I was nausea, fatigued and my head hurt so bad I thought I was dying. All that is typical since I get Migraines often but this week it lasted 4 days. I guess that's typical as well. But today I looked at the calendar and I seen that Tuesday was Mar. 19th. March 19th, 2003 was the day Bush declared war with Iraq, and well I was a sitting duck.

I have been noticing over the years, the past 3 I have been examining myself, that on certain days of the year, usually tragic, the conscious mind doesn't even need to be aware of the date but the sub conscious brain still feels the terrible memories. Because of that it can cause sadness, sickness, depression and even suicide, for no known reason. I'm not a doctor, or therapist and I don't feel like trying to find an article to prove my theory. I'm just saying that in my experience and examination I have found a lot of my depression to be surrounded around recurrences of tragic dates, year by year.

And that friends is what happens to me. So if I skip a few days, even though I plan to write everyday, stay with me. I hope I am sharing fun and educational stories. I want my pain and suffering to help others if possible. I like writing and I think blogging everyday will help improve my writing. I don't even think anyone reads this yet but I'm still doing it. It's for myself as much as for the world, and the friends I may make. So I will try harder, and stick to my plan. Everyday, that I can.


(These pictures are not mine, and I'm bad at referencing pics from FB, sorry)

Jesyka Lynn