Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Domestic Violence Info

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE STATISTICS
·        85% - 95% of all domestic violence victims are female 
·        Over 5000,00 women are stalked by an intimate partner each year 
·        5.3 million women are abused each year 
·        As many as 324,000 women each year experience domestic violence during their pregnancy 
·        1,232 women each year are killed by an intimate partner 
·        Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women 
·        Women are more likely to be attacked by someone that they know rather than by a stranger 
·        An estimated 5.3 million cases of domestic violence occur among U.S. women 18 and older each year, resulting in nearly 2 million injuries 
·        On average, more than three women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends in the U.S. every day 
·        In a survey by the US Conference of Mayors, 56% of cities surveyed cited domestic violence as a primary cause of homelessness 
·        50% to 70% of men who abuse women also abuse children 
·        Homicide is the leading cause of death for women in the workplace 
·        Of the approximately 1.7 million incidents of workplace violence that occur in the U.S. every year, 18,700 are committed by an intimate partner: a current or former spouse, lover, partner or boyfriend/girlfriend

     Are you yet wondering why I posted this, even before I begin my story? Well you see, that you seeing those statistics is more important to me than you even reading my story. Yes today I am going to tell you 2 stories, summed up. Prepare yourself, they are not pretty.

     This weekend a friend of mine came to my house. She had sun glasses on and so I asked why, even though I already knew the answer. You see her face was badly beaten on both sides. She had a horrible black eye and could barely walk upright because of the bruises on her ribs. I had to take her under my wing for the last few days because she didn’t know what to do.

     I proceeded in helping her to find the resources necessary. From the start she needed to visit the hospital and even be strong and tell them what happened. The hospital got the police involved, which made it easier for her to do the right thing and turn him in. I am glad she followed through because you will not believe what happened next. Her boyfriend left her house after beating the crap out of her and went straight to the police and turned her in! I guess he didn’t realize how badly he tore up her face and thought that he could get away with it. Now I don’t know where this is going yet, I just wanted to put the knowledge into everyone’s head.
Now I will share my summed up version of a very lengthy story with you.


     In the beginning of 2005 I met the most wonderful, sweet, romantic man. He was my prince charming and he lifted my spirits and gave me the world. About 3 months into the relationship he hit me for the first time. He didn’t ‘just’ hit me but remember this is the short version. Immediately when he was through he loved me so much, and was so-so very sorry and promised never to do it again. This went on every couple months for the next 3 years until he almost killed me. I made him go to therapy, with no avail. He was just doing it to please me. So one day I packed me and my kids up from my own house (I was the only one on the lease) and went to the domestic violence shelter. I ended up getting fed up with being there and got a macho attitude that I should be in my own home, it was mine and I deserved to be there. True fact: I did deserve to be there, safely though. Needless to say I went home, he said everything I wanted to hear and then he moved back in. 1 month later I lost custody of my children because of the abuse and that only made it worse. I almost died, probably 5 times. And then PRISON saved my life.

     There’s more but that’s enough for today. The moral is, stop it on site. Men (and women) who cause Domestic Violence are unpredictable. They are capable of anything, even framing you for their behavior. They will eventually kill you, so please call the police, shelter, anyone you can and ask for help. Remember never to go back after the first time, it ALWAYS progresses. One last fact; I never turned him in and to this day he continues to find weaker willed women, quiet and depressed or just reserved because he sniffs them out like a hound dog and thinks he can control them, and he beats them too. All because I let him get away with it and so are the others. And I regret it everyday. Women please do the right thing.

     *I am not a therapist or Domestic Violence worker of any kind, this is solely based off life experience.



Wednesday, June 26, 2013

What's Up Wednesday

Wow, it's almost 10 pm. I knew I had to write a blog, just forgot it was this one, lol. So I have a lot to say in hopefully a quick but interesting manner.

1st I need to share that today I was notified that I am a chosen winner in one of the many Blogger Giveaways I participated in recently. Thank you to the Mia @ The Chronicles of Chaos for posting the $10.00 Amazon Gift Card for Jenn over at Party of One's birthday June 12th, 2013. I was the lucky winner of that gift card and I am totally ecstatic. Thank you all for hosting her birthday giveaway and once again Happy Birthday Girl. Birthdays are great, blogging is great, giveaways are great, and winning is ultimately great!

So what else is up??? Just been enjoying the nice hot sun rays, hanging with friends, doing some major shopping, finding awesome thrifty items, making candles and aromatherapy salts and oils and totally enjoying the relationship I have right now. For once I'm in one that isn't moving to fast for me. I like it!!!




"I'd fight a bear for you"

My lil sis is having some scary issues right now and I'm worried for her and praying with all my might.

I'm falling in love with blogging but at the same time I am enjoying life outside away from the computer more than I ever have in my life.But at the same time every time I have a problem with any of this computer stuff I am missing giving up on furthering my career in that department, but I am really good at mixing essential oils to provide healthy, aromatherapy benefits. So now I am really trying to put my focus into where my life is leading me.

One place it is leading me is back home. It will be a few months maybe but eventually I will be back in the 1st and 3rd capitol of my wonderful state. God I cannot wait.

I am also loving writing poetry again. I you haven't already please stop over to my blog Magical Writings and give me a holler and a follow.

And by the way to those that read my Weight Loss blog, I got myself weighed today and since I wrote that blog I have lost another 7 pounds. GO ME!!!

I guess I am going to say this is it for this week. Let me know what you think, I'd love this to become a link-up, but for now it's my way of keeping you informed. Blessings to you.

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

What's Up Wednesday

Okay so this is What's Up, I have so much energy today that I actually got bored for a moment because I was so hyper I didn't know what to do with myself. I'm guessing that has something to do with the fact that I got very sad last Wednesday and was in bed being lazy for about 4 days. Now I am refreshed and totally energized. I feel like I could take on the world. I can do anything I want to do. Now, honestly I just gotta keep this going and hurry up and figure out what I really want to conquer. I conquered a lot last week, I was getting shit done.

Then me and Jason had  a talk and of course as soon as you talk about feelings and the future, someone has to get all anxious and try to bail. Depressing crap, especially when the only reason you talk about that crap is because he decides to say that he loves you. Loves me but then wants to run-away. Well I think that we got that all cleared up. We decided that if we do get in that lovey mood and say crazy things that we'll know it's in the heat of the moment (not sex people) and we will just not take it seriously. I never did anyway. My heart is in hate mode, which means I am protecting it for now.

Also, What's Up is that last week I got the mole on my lip cut off. I'm going to blog about it with pictures once it is completely healed. Almost there.

Me and My Wonderful Sisters

And my 'lil sis Nakita sent me an invitation for her Bachelor's Degree Graduation. I am totally pumped about it and can't wait for the date. (I better be able to go.) I only graduated with a certification so technically she'll be the first from our family. Go Nakita, I love you girl!

And then I have totally been blogging a lot, obviously for myself. That's totally fine on some of this stuff but I wish I was interesting enough to get at least one follower. I wonder what I can do better. If you are reading this, I would love to hear some feedback in the comments section. At least I always have it saved for myself, that's all that really matters. I have lost so much digital documents that blogging makes it really nice for journaling because it's always saved online. Also clouds are like my digital best friend. I love the backup and accessing from any device. Really awesome. And now I am rambling, blah, blah, blah. I got to go, later lovies!


Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Holding on or Letting go???

Alright this post is not going to be based on the political correct idea or what you should do, but on what I am feeling I should do. I listened to a lot of crap throughout my life about walking away and letting go when things aren't as they should be. But I don't want to let go ever again.

Here are a few examples of CRAP I read, and have even shared on Facebook. And yes in the back of my mind and thinking of my heart, I have been totally for this method.

via Positive Quotes on Facebook
(nothing against this page, I just needed a pic)

Yes there is definitely a limit on how much and how bad a person should be able to treat you but honestly for the last however many years I have been hateful and sad, I walked away from a lot of really good people for making mistakes. I keep doing it, every time someone makes me mad, or hurts my feelings.

Now that I am trying to completely start my life over, and yes I hope I find a few great friends, at this point I haven't. Basically I am realizing that if I want to have friends at all, I am going to have to accept the fact that people make mistakes. And yes sometimes they are horrible mistakes. Even I have made many, and maybe some people have walked away from me.

Also I would like to comment on this one. I actually had an experience with this and followed though with leaving all of them behind when my troubles were over. Not fun and to be very honest that's when I started walking away from people who screwed me over. However as I look back and sit here friendless (almost) I am realizing that by living so true to these words that I have lost everyone, including some very important people that I loved dearly.

via someone on fb



The reason all this is on my mind is because I recently had a friend of like 5 months make me completely irate. And for a few days I had to calm myself down. I felt like that person did what they did to intentionally upset me. I have had to realize that it had nothing to do with me, and I honestly feel like it has nothing to do with how they feel about me. I have always told myself that whoever did something hurtful or wasn't there when I needed them was because they didn't care about me, probably no one else, or even them self  But I have realized that may not always be true. Actually it almost never is if I think really hard because everyone I have hurt has always been people I love with all of my heart. It was just a stupid mistake, that had everything to do with me, and almost always ended up regretting but not even all of the time.

And I can finally say that my whole new outlook on how I want things to be is totally working for me. I want to be able to forgive people, no matter what. If I don't want to do it for them that's fine, I'll have to evaluate the situation as I am now and determine my best course of action. Should I hold on to that friendship or should let go and walk away. If I walk away every time I will still be sitting here lonely, losing friends the moment I make them. So this time I'm going to stay, for now. If it happens again I might walk away but everyone deserves a second chance, maybe 5, 10 or 50, who knows. No matter what you have to forgive for your own piece of mind. If not for them, do it for yourself.


via Positive Quotes on Facebook

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Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Bi-polar Love


Hello, thanks for stopping by. This is Tuesday and my day to share some writing with you. Hope you enjoy. Please remember to comment, subscribe or follow. Blessings and Love.

Bi-Polar Love Affair - Haiku
I say hateful things
I love being your lover
The sadness is mine

I get mad at you
I never want another
Tell me what to do
I am so confused

Should I leave or should I stay
That's me loving you

Jesyka Lynn

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

I guess I'm gonna rant or whatever to get me back in the mood

Well its been awhile since I've wrote anything. I guess I have a few ideas, I'll kinda try not to get to specific on any one thing. I really need to brainstorm alittle. My thoughts have been all over the place the past few months, mainly because I had a lot of stress going on and partly because I was manic, and jesus when my mind gets like that it is impossible to put anything into an order of any sorts. I guess thats what brainstorming and free writing is for. :)

So of course with all the stress going on, I have lots of things to talk about. Especially since I have turned it all around. Yep thats right, I have been working extra hard on life. Also I read an awesome book on turning things around. The book is about letting go of love and acceptance.  Absolutely amazing, but I guess I'm going to leave that to another post because it definitely deserves it very own page.

Other things that have happened is that I have now been single for 4 months. Yep thats right, 120 days today. And as scared as I was I now have a great appreciation for independence and a inner love for myself. At the beginning of that time I had a relapse of mental health issues and I had a wonderful hospitalization.  Yes it was wonderful, the staff thought me so much on how to do the best I can in life and I actually listened whole heartedly for the very first time. Things are amazing in my life today and my next goal is to organize everything so I can share my experiences with you.

Summarized  I am going to start with talking about The Work, then I am going to talk about relationships and why you dont need them and signs that they are unhealthy from the beginning, then alittle about obsession and how to break the bond you feel that you have, mental health issues and how to manage them, isolation and how to venture out little by little, and the amazing holistic ways I have discovered that are working hard in my life right now.

Wow, thats a big list, I better get started soon. Thanks for reading, be sure to subscribe and check me out on Facebook if you'd like, www.facebook.com/iamjasminerayne .