Showing posts with label divorce. Show all posts
Showing posts with label divorce. Show all posts

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Domestic Violence Info

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE STATISTICS
·        85% - 95% of all domestic violence victims are female 
·        Over 5000,00 women are stalked by an intimate partner each year 
·        5.3 million women are abused each year 
·        As many as 324,000 women each year experience domestic violence during their pregnancy 
·        1,232 women each year are killed by an intimate partner 
·        Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women 
·        Women are more likely to be attacked by someone that they know rather than by a stranger 
·        An estimated 5.3 million cases of domestic violence occur among U.S. women 18 and older each year, resulting in nearly 2 million injuries 
·        On average, more than three women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends in the U.S. every day 
·        In a survey by the US Conference of Mayors, 56% of cities surveyed cited domestic violence as a primary cause of homelessness 
·        50% to 70% of men who abuse women also abuse children 
·        Homicide is the leading cause of death for women in the workplace 
·        Of the approximately 1.7 million incidents of workplace violence that occur in the U.S. every year, 18,700 are committed by an intimate partner: a current or former spouse, lover, partner or boyfriend/girlfriend

     Are you yet wondering why I posted this, even before I begin my story? Well you see, that you seeing those statistics is more important to me than you even reading my story. Yes today I am going to tell you 2 stories, summed up. Prepare yourself, they are not pretty.

     This weekend a friend of mine came to my house. She had sun glasses on and so I asked why, even though I already knew the answer. You see her face was badly beaten on both sides. She had a horrible black eye and could barely walk upright because of the bruises on her ribs. I had to take her under my wing for the last few days because she didn’t know what to do.

     I proceeded in helping her to find the resources necessary. From the start she needed to visit the hospital and even be strong and tell them what happened. The hospital got the police involved, which made it easier for her to do the right thing and turn him in. I am glad she followed through because you will not believe what happened next. Her boyfriend left her house after beating the crap out of her and went straight to the police and turned her in! I guess he didn’t realize how badly he tore up her face and thought that he could get away with it. Now I don’t know where this is going yet, I just wanted to put the knowledge into everyone’s head.
Now I will share my summed up version of a very lengthy story with you.


     In the beginning of 2005 I met the most wonderful, sweet, romantic man. He was my prince charming and he lifted my spirits and gave me the world. About 3 months into the relationship he hit me for the first time. He didn’t ‘just’ hit me but remember this is the short version. Immediately when he was through he loved me so much, and was so-so very sorry and promised never to do it again. This went on every couple months for the next 3 years until he almost killed me. I made him go to therapy, with no avail. He was just doing it to please me. So one day I packed me and my kids up from my own house (I was the only one on the lease) and went to the domestic violence shelter. I ended up getting fed up with being there and got a macho attitude that I should be in my own home, it was mine and I deserved to be there. True fact: I did deserve to be there, safely though. Needless to say I went home, he said everything I wanted to hear and then he moved back in. 1 month later I lost custody of my children because of the abuse and that only made it worse. I almost died, probably 5 times. And then PRISON saved my life.

     There’s more but that’s enough for today. The moral is, stop it on site. Men (and women) who cause Domestic Violence are unpredictable. They are capable of anything, even framing you for their behavior. They will eventually kill you, so please call the police, shelter, anyone you can and ask for help. Remember never to go back after the first time, it ALWAYS progresses. One last fact; I never turned him in and to this day he continues to find weaker willed women, quiet and depressed or just reserved because he sniffs them out like a hound dog and thinks he can control them, and he beats them too. All because I let him get away with it and so are the others. And I regret it everyday. Women please do the right thing.

     *I am not a therapist or Domestic Violence worker of any kind, this is solely based off life experience.



Monday, October 15, 2012

A Love Letter

I have been too upset and stressed lately to actually write about anything, but I thought I would share my letter to my ex about how I feel.

I don't know when it happened, it just did. I have a right to be selfish, for years it was me and noone else. That wasn't what I wanted. I wanted to be an equal priority  I feel I was for awhile, and it was great. We had everything together here. Your kids, and mine were next. Supposedly. But at some point, I stopped mattering to you. Anything I wanted was no longer an option. You can call me jealous if you want. That's not what it is at all.I want your kids to come before me. I'd rather be equal to them, but when the fuck did I become last? I no longer matter at all. In my eyes its you, my kids, your kids, close friends and family, and then others who shouldn't matter. If I put someone in that last category for you, you should respect my wishes since I should be #1. Your immediate family comes first, and I am your immediate family. If not, when did it stop? When did you stop caring? I became less important and then you acted like a fool checkin up on everything I did. You smothered me and you no longer cared for me. And now, more than ever, I have this fight in me. And I am trying so hard, so fucking hard and you keep leaving me hangin and shutting me down. How much more punishment do I have to endure. This year has been hell. So damn stressful, nothing but a fight. And now I feel you owe me. I bought the Van the least you could do is 1.) pay me for your half, or 2.) Give me a ride when I need it. I offered you $20.00 for gas and you can't even do that, even though I bought the vehicle and the gas. WTF? 

I might have more to say later. Peace and Blessed Be.

Friday, September 21, 2012

Break Up Apology Poem

I needed a break
That you wouldn't take
Now I've made a decision
That I can not change

It kills me inside
Not only you
I fed on your love
And needed you too

But now I see
The decision that beseeched me
Was widely needed If not for you
Then for me

Please know in your heart
That I was always around
I just needed a break
A night on the town

I loved you
With every breath that I took
I was upset
Please, just let me off the hook

So I'm calling a truce
With you, here and now
Friends till the end
Please let me know how